Adult ADD and Money

Six weeks left to file your taxes

There is only six weeks left to file your taxes in the United States. My wife recently wrote a post titled : Time to think about Taxes. The first thing I thought was that I need to think about filing our taxes. The next thing I thought about was making sure that I had all of my receipts, tax forms and bank statements. There have been times when after struggling to find all of my important documents; I ended up not being able to find a bank statement. If you are missing a document it is a lot easier to get a copy with six weeks left to file your taxes then it is when you have only a week. 

If you haven't filed your taxes yet, take a little bit of time now to make sure you have everything you need to file. It could save you a lot of stress and unneeded aggravation. 

Bank of Mom and Dad Review

The Bank of Mom and Dad is a show that each week features a different young women who is having financial issues. The parents of the young women move in with their child and work to teach them lessons to help turn around their finances. The show also features Farnoosh Torabi, a financial expert who helps by giving budget and financial advice. So far I have watched two episodes of The Bank of Mom and Dad and I have been really surprised. The show is not only entertaining, but shows realistic advice and lessons for people who are having financial issues.

The show deals with many issues that young adults with ADD often deal with. So far the episodes have dealt with issues such as organization, overspending, and unpaid parking tickets. It is a good watch for people who have their own financial issues and for parents who want to help their adult children with financial issues. It offers good advice in a very entertaining and friendly way.   

( for more information about the show see "Trust Me" over the "Bank of Mom and Dad" ) 

"Trust Me" over the "Bank of Mom and Dad"

With our struggling economy many more adult children feel like they are being forced to ask their parents for financial help. On September 30th, a new reality show called "Bank of Mom and Dad" will air on the SoapNet cable network. Each week the show will deal a 20 something women who parents will move in with them and with the help of a financial expert, will try to help their daughter to adjust their financial lifestyle to what they can actually afford. The concept seems somewhat interesting, but I have severe doubts on whether a reality show is the right format to help someone reform their finances. Perhaps I will review the show later next week.

If you are interested in truly helping your young adult children achieve financial independence try reading Trust Me , by Kenneth Kaye Ph.D. with Nick Kaye. It is an excellent guide for parents of young adult children who are struggling with their finances. It deals not only with setting up a plan to get back your child on the road to financial success, but deals with the emotional and trust issues that financial struggles can bring. Nick Kaye also does an excellent job of giving parents the insights of a young adult who has had financial struggles. (I know that I related to many of his struggles)

Trust Me also deals with several interesting topics, including how to deal with your children if they have to move back in, basic financial education, tax issues, and information dealing with trust funds and partnerships. The chapter that I found the most interesting was Attention Money Disorder which deals with how Learning Disorders affects financial management skills. The chapter was inspired by how Nick’s Attention Deficit Disorder affected his financial choices, and by the research that Dr. Kaye did on ADD in order to have a better understanding on how it affected his son. This chapter gives great tips and insights, and I plan on reviewing it more in depth in a later post.

I am a big fan of reality television and I will watch the Bank of Mom and Dad, but if you really want information to help you deal with the parent/child financial relationship I strongly recommend that you purchase Trust Me.       

$ 696 Billion on Hospital care

According to a special report in the September 23rd edition of USA today, 31% of the United States health care spending in 2007 was for hospital care. The total dollars spent on hospital care in 2007 was 696 billion dollars.

Why is this number so important, it is 1 and a half times the amount that the US spent on physcian and clinical services. It is my opinion that if the US were able to find a way to focus more of our spending on preventative measures ( clinical and physcian services) we would have a more efficent system and healthier citizens.

I am not in favor of a full government system like several other countries. But there has to be measures made to promote preventative care. Insurance reform is critical, but the private sector is also working on ways to encourage preventative care. For example drug stores are setting up clinics that are being used for cheaper and conveinent preventatative care.

This is critical for everyone but especially for adults with ADD who are concerned about their money. Got any ideas to improve our system, let me know what you think.

Making Your Own Rules

I have been looking at my library of books about personal finance, I find it overwhelming and I do not have adult ADHD. You can have any rules that you want when it comes to managing finances as long it cover a few core areas.

1. Education - There are so many people who are looking to take advantage of the under-informed. Education is key in figuring out what you want and more importantly why you want it   

2. General Philosophy- Do you like to play it safe, or are you a risk taker? Are you a saver or a spender? How much do you give to others? There are no right answers to these questions, but you need to know yourphilosophy on money, so you can understand and defend to yourself your financial decisions.

3. Goals - One you have established your philosophy, its important to set some goals that are in line with your money management philosophy

4. Systems - It is important to have a game plan with managing daily spending, paying bills, and making day to day decisions.

5.Analysis - Are your goals, systems, and philosophy working for you. What are you doing well and where do you need to change.

The 1 Month Budget

As someone who does not have ADHD, I love to plan. There have been times in my life, where I have prepared and tried to stick to budgets that have been for a year or longer. Honestly I think my budget plan was pretty sound, and logically there should have been no reason why I could not stick to it.

What I did not take into account was the physical, emotional, and mental barriers that we encounter every day. My budget did not take into account that things broke, and had to be repaired or replaced. I did not take into account times when I just wanted to do something, or get something. I did not deal well when I was unable to stick to my budget, and therefore gave myself permission to continue to make bad financial decisions because I had already blown my plan for the year.

I still continue to do longer term financial planning when it comes to certain financial goals. My current budget however is for just a month. I know there are a lot of people reading this, that just shiver when I mention the term budget, however having a one month budget is simple enough to prepare, and is an important tool to help you prioritize your spending. If you prepare your budget on a spread sheet, it is something that should only take a couple of minutes each month to update. The most important aspect of the one month budget for me is that it forces me to focus on the present. It is harder for me to push off paying down a loan, or putting less money in my savings, because I can't put if off on my budget. It is important for allof us to keep the majority of our financial focus on the present, it is where all of the action takes place that will help shape our financial future.

Overlooking the Obvious

Everyday on my way to and from work I pass by a new Market and Deli that I think about going into. They have done an excellent job at advertising, with billboards and an electronic sign that gets your attention. When I look at the lunch and takeout menu they have diverse items that I think that I would enjoy, there is just one big glaring problem. The deli is on a really narrow dirt road where you can not even see the building from the main road. I am sure that many other people like me, have thought about trying the new deli and end up changing their mind when faced with this one annoying obstacle.

Sometimes when making money management decisions ADD adults get so caught up in dealing with  small, more stimulating decisions that they overlook the most obvious reasons why they are struggling financially. I am not saying that projects like improving your credit score, reducing your grocery bill, reducing your total energy use, or perfecting your investment portfolio are not worthwhile endeavors. But the fact is that if you want true financial change in your life you have to deal with the tough main issues that are holding you back. For some people it is finding meaningful work that they enjoy, for others it is dealing with the emotional issues that cause overspending, or it can be developing and executing the systems to help pay and manage bills.

I believe that if the Market & Deli wants to have long term success, it is going to have to do something about improving how people can access it. This is not a simple or easy decision, it could mean moving the deli to a place where it can been seen, or it may mean widening and improving the road so that it is more inviting. The more challenging and difficult a task is the more likely you will receive a greater benefit from dealing with it. Often people want easy ways to deal with their problems and most of the time they get frustrated when the truth is that most challenges you deal with in life are not easy. 

My love/hate (mostly hate) relationship with Money

Diane Ladd challenged her readers to write about their love affair with money. (For more information see previous post) I have got to admit that this is a difficult assignment for me. I think this is because even though I work in the Financial industry and my blog is titled Adult ADD and Money, I really have come to loathe money is general. I don't really loathe the concept of money, I loathe the damage that having money or lacking money can cause to a person.

Growing up I viewed money as the great divider. The social groups that you were in mostly depended on your perceived social status. Money bought you the clothes so that you would fit in in school, it determined your social calendar, and bought you the toys you could brag about. Sometimes the scorn of kids who had more money than me was so thick you could cut it with a knife. You could feel their attitude of superiority, and it hurt.

I deserve a lot of the blame for my relationship with money. When I have had a little extra I would always find someway to spend it all that gave me a temporary high. I tried to ignore money when I was lacking it, but that never solved my problems, money is a cruel lover and was always seeking revenge when I was neglectful. I don't always appreciate what money has done for me and I feel I am not always putting enough into the relationship to keep it stable in the future.

However my relationship with money is continuing to improve. Once I discovered that money was not responsible for my happiness, that I was the only person or thing who was in charge of my happiness. I have been less judgmental of the relationship that I and others have with money, I have been more accepting of money's faults, and I continue to notice more of money's strengths. There just might be hope for us yet.

Interesting ADD Friendly Blog Posts - 4/9

Here are three blog posts that I have read this week that are ADD friendly and deal with money issues that are common for adults with ADD.

A quick and easy way to control spending (Brip Blap)

60% of NBA Players Go Broke Within 5 Years of Retirement? (All Financial Matters)

Tax Cat: Help! I Owe The IRS Money And I Don't Have Any! (The Consumerist)

There are two stages between Education and Action

In Jennifer Koretsky's book Odd One Out (The Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD) she lists the four stages in order to make true lasting change in your life. The four stages are:

1.  Education

2.  Awareness

3.  Reframing

4.  Action 

The problem that many ADD adults have when trying to make financial changes is that they take action without properly going through the other stages of change. Many people who want to make financial changes start by trying to educate themselves. There are two main pitfalls that happen during the education stage. People get overwhelmed with the vast amount of financial information and stop making progress toward their goals, and people map out an unrealistic action plan based only on the education that they did.

Being overwhelmed can derail any goal, the key is to make your goal specific enough so that you can limit the scope of your education. For example it is a lot easier to educate yourself about getting out off debt, than it is to educate yourself on improving your finances.

The other pitfall of going from education directly to action can be even more detrimental than taking no action at all. When developing a financial action plan it is important to understand your strengths and weaknesses in regards to your financial behavior (Awareness). For example if you did not have any issues with impulsive spending, but did have issues with actually paying your bills you would want your action plan to focus on changing you bill paying behavior.  Instead of focusing on not paying your bills you could focus on how to increase the likelihood of paying your bills on time (Reframing). This could involve getting someone else to support you, paying bills when you are at your mental peak, or automating some of the bill paying steps. By focusing on all of the stages of change you will be more likely to make progress with your financial goals.